Resilience Book Review

May 30th, 2009

by John R. Sedivy

I have just finished “Resilience” by Elizabeth Edwards and wanted to express a few thoughts on this book as I believe it is appropriate to this blog. This book was outside of what I would normally read but I had picked up a copy due to it being number one on the New York Times Best Sellers List for nonfiction at the time of this writing.

My initial expectation was that this would be a biographical type of work centered around the challenges of the life of Elizabeth Edwards and her support of her husband, John Edwards presidential campaign – to include the extramarital affair. In reality, the book had only a tiny bit of political reference, a tad bit of scandal, but was mostly inspirational in nature. I am not one to follow the whims of the mainstream media, and really am not into the dirt of others – so this was a pleasant surprise. In fact, I believe this book embodies the spirit of vulnerable marketing as I had described in previous articles – I will elaborate further.

Vulnerable Yet Resilient
Elizabeth Edwards basically lays it all on the line. She discusses her vulnerabilities and the challenges she has overcome in her life. She does not whine or complain, quite the contrary, she appears to be a woman who is grateful for what she has experienced in life, but like any individual, has had to overcome a great number of obstacles in reaching this point in her life. Although not perfect, her vulnerabilities and the book as a whole make her and her family appear all too human.

Prior to reading this book I had known very little about Elizabeth Edwards, really the only thing I had known was that she is the wife of a former presidential candidate. Besides the inspirational knowledge I have gained from this book I am glad for having read it as I feel much more knowledgeable about her, and the Edwards family as a whole. She has experienced much in her life, watching the passing of her father, the death of her teenage son, her bouts with bone and breast Cancer, and the infidelity of her husband, to name a few. Despite all of this she portrays herself as a strong supporter of her husband, paints her entire family in a positive light, and pushes for the needs of others who may not be as fortunate.

Although I cannot relate to the difficulties she has endured, her tone is human and she provides a strong description of the events which had transpired in her life. This paints a vivid picture of what has shaped her and her family. Admittedly this is a tough read – I actually purchased the audio version, which had an underlying sadness to the delivery. However, this sadness was complimented by the strength to pull through the challenges that came to the author.

A Different Approach
This book is not your typical tell all with sordid details of indiscretion and controversy that one may expect from the wife of a presidential candidate. In contrast this is a very human look at the very real ramifications that resulted from the actions of individuals who were all too human. It is really a collage of one’s total life experience, up to this point in time, and how she has navigated the gauntlet of challenges laid before her. It is my impression that this is not meant to be a “flash in the pan” for publicity, but a heartfelt memoir. Blame is not placed, and she does not feel sorry for herself, but really just tells the unfolding of events from her perspective.

My guess is that some may chastise Elizabeth Edwards for this approach. They may think that she should suffer in silence and may be doing this for mainly monetary gain or political aspirations. One can never truly know the motivations of another, however that is not my impression here. I believe that this work is intended to be inspiration in that it shows that even the most powerful of families have their issues to work through – they have their challenges just as any average American does. In sharing this information, and potentially putting themselves in a position of weakness, the Edwards family provides inspiration to those experiencing similar challenges. You are not defined by your challenges – but how you react to these challenges. Furthermore, making yourself vulnerable opens you to expanded experiences and opportunities. Viktor Frankl in “Man’s Search For Meaning” discusses how creating something is one way of giving your life meaning – this is essence what I believe Elizabeth Edwards has done for herself with “Resilience.”

Relevance
After completing this book I could not help but reflect upon how this all fit in with my recent articles I had written on deformed time as well as the overall concept of vulnerable marketing. Given the challenges that Elizabeth Edwards had overcome it is likely that she had experienced deformed time on a number of occasions. But as with the theme behind those articles, she has appeared to have been successful at translating challenges into opportunities, by recognizing each challenge as a unique opportunity for tremendous growth. One should not seek to suffer needlessly, however in the face of imposed suffering once should recognize it as a strong opportunity.

Resilience is the essence of the concept of vulnerable marketing which I had originally identified. Resisting the urge to portray yourself as something you are not can be difficult – especially during the most trying of times. However, without the courage to do so, others will not be able to benefit from your lessons learned, and others may even suffer needlessly in isolation. Because like attracts like, having the courage to be vulnerable, either as a person or a business, will result in positive effects – you will attract others with who you may readily relate.

In closing, I commend Elizabeth Edwards for having the courage to write this book. Although it will not likely go down in history as the best literary work, and may disappoint those looking for a tabloid experience, I believe this a fine example of an individual being human and conveying their vulnerabilities for the benefit of others.

Allowing yourself to be vulnerable pushes you to new heights and truly benefits others!

-John R. Sedivy of Cape Cod Branding